G

They are all fighting inside me. No it’s not just two, a thought and its contradiction, as always are. No fight of good vs. bad, sane vs. insane, safe vs. risky, or real vs. illusion. But I am, today, a battlefield for many. It is not a simple game as A vs. B. But complex, very complex. They are so many teams, maybe 4 or 5 and I don't know who is against whom, for that matter even teams don't know. It’s not even the survival of fittest, but it’s let’s all survive and dig this ground.
They seem to have no plan of ending this battle, as if they are enjoying it. Yes indeed this is a fun game, for they have nothing to lose, but I am losing my head, my sanity, my thoughts (Did I ever had any thought). But I am loosing something maybe my voice, because of what to say, A, B, C or D and A, B, C, D are mocking at me. Or maybe I just realised that voice was always worthless and there is new entry in game, E.
I don't know when this battle will get over, not a battle but a game, not a game to win but to enjoy. Maybe like a game to dig the ground and race in the mud and then while around stupid acts in mud to push, pull, race, fight and then mock at the wretchedness of the ground. And what did I write, was this A, B, C, D or E or F. Am I really going insane or maybe I am being sane for the first time in my life.